Prayer For One Who Has Taken His Own Life
(Father Benedict J. Groeschel, C.F.R.) taken from the book "Praying in the Presence of Our Lord for the Holy Souls" by Susan Tassone
Crucified Savior, there is no place for me to go but to the foot of Your Cross. I feel desolation, defeat, betrayal, rejection. I tried. I tried to stop the flood, to calm the earthquake, to put out the raging fire. I did not even know how desperate it all was. There is absolutely no consolation, no answer, no softening of my grief. It is complete darkness. I grieve for my dear friend [or relative], for what was and what could have been. Is life so awful that all struggle had to end, that defeat was inevitable? There is nothing but silence outside and screaming inside. I know that the wound will heal, but now I don’t even want it to. I know that there will be a huge scar in its place. That scar will be all that I have left.
I am filled with terror for the one I loved and cared for. Salvation. If only I was certain of salvation for the one who is gone, defeated by this life. There is no one I can come to but You – Crucified One. Your prayer of dereliction, which always puzzled me before, now is the only thing with any meaning at all. I put my dear one whose body is destroyed into Your hands. Reach down from the Cross and embrace this wounded and broken soul. You descended into hell. Find our friend on the edge and rescue the one who has gone from us. We have no place to go in the world, in the whole universe but here to You, to Your Cross – it is our only hope. Into Your hands, O Lord, we commend this spirit. Amen.
The following comment was written before this prayer in Susan Tassone's book, Praying in the Presence of Our Lord for the Holy Souls:
ReplyDeleteFr. Groeschel wrote in Arise From Darkness, Ignatius Press, 1995, "The death of a loved one by suicide is one of the most appalling experiences one can endure. There is an anguish comprehended only by those who have experienced it. Since I lived through a suicide long ago, I write this prayer just for those who know. Although this disturbed young man took his life many years ago, when his girlfriend rejected him, the gunshot still echoes through my mind."